On Santa Claus

We don't do Santa.

There. I said it. So controversial, right? ;) Yeah, we're rebels.

We've got nothing against the jolly old fella, but we just kind of omit him in our Christmas festivities. We know he's not the devil or even believe he's anti-Christian. We like Santa and the kids watch movies like Frosty the Snowman, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, even read books like The Night Before Christmas. We just don't try to convince our children that he's real. Because he's not. They know him as a character, just like Mickey Mouse or Cinderella.

Wade and I made this decision last year when Reese was 3. We both feel that there are so many lies out there that are told to our children (You need to be a certain weight to be pretty. More things will make you happier. It's not cool to wear clothes that don't have brand names. etc....) and our job as parents was to make sure she knew what was TRUE. It just felt weird lying to her about who put that present under the tree for her to open. Why give the credit to someone else when we spent our hard-earned money on something special for our child?

Or how about telling my kids to be good and then they'll get lots of presents? Uh, how about my kids are well behaved because that's what I expect of them all year long. And Santa's always "watching"? Creepy.

I want my kids to know that I will always be honest with them. If they find out one day that I had made up this whole Santa story, I don't want them to wonder what else isn't true (perhaps the birth of Jesus and the nativity scene?). A few weeks ago, Reese really reinforced the decision we had made. One night after reading a book about the first Christmas, she told Wade, "But Jesus is just pretend, right Daddy?" They talked about it, but it was quite eye opening.

So basically, we don't judge people who do carry on the tradition of Santa Claus because really, it's cute. But this just works best for our family.

So if we don't do Santa, what do we do? Just about everything else. My kids will definitely feel the magic of Christmas. They know that, first and foremost, we are celebrating Jesus' birthday! But we also make cookies & other goodies, drink hot chocolate & look at Christmas lights, get presents under the Christmas tree, buy gifts for our Adopt-A-Family, particiate in a Jesse Tree, make snowmen, attend Christmas services at church, decorate the house, and the list goes on and on.

I will admit it has been a little hard. It seems it's an easy ice breaker for every. single. adult to ask R&B if they've seen Santa yet and what they asked him for Christmas. Reese is slightly confused. Why do relatives and strangers keep talking about Santa like he's real? Don't they know? Then there's the challenge of making sure she doesn't spoil it for other kids... We've discussed this with her too.

I'm still not 100% sure if we've made the right decision, but I guess we'll find out. Hopefully my kids won't resent me down the road for stealing their childhood fantasies about Santa. And if you happen to see my kids after Christmas, please don't ask them what Santa brought them, Reese is still not sure what to say. :)

A bit of news...

This comes as no suprise to most of you, but it's about time I shared that we will adding another member to our family in May 2011.

I am 17 weeks along and feeling fabulous!

In other news, Reese has been fighting a ear infection for about a month. It hasn't caused her any pain, so besides her not hearing as well as normal, we had no idea. She was referred to the doctor since she didn't pass her hearing test at school and as of yesterday is on anibiotics 3x a day.

Beckett is fighting his own little cold that seems to finally be getting better. Lots of fevers and waking up in the middle of the night last week meant the Little Guy slept in our bed quite a bit. (Which equals less sleep for me, since the kid moves around a ton. Wade hardly notices.)

And right now, Reese is off from school and is watching Narnia, Beckett is sleeping, and I am munching on M&Ms. In a bit, we'll make these before we get ready for the second showing of our house today. (More on that later ;) )



Invisible Mothers

My mother-in-law sent me this today, and it was just what I needed. Lately, I feel like I've been losing myself. Not really many friends to cling to, stuck in the day to day routines, not nearly enough time with my husband. If you ask me, the years from 0-2 were cake compared to now. (There's a big difference in taking care of babies and actually raising children.) How did my mom do this???

So today, this short story made me feel a little better, but I'll continue to sip my caramel mocha from McDonald's and wallow in my self pity. Just one of those days....

The Invisible Mother

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'

Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all. I'm invisible. The invisible Mom. Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more! Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this??

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?' I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?' I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

Some days I'm a crystal ball; 'Where's my other sock?, Where's my phone?, What's for dinner?'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history, music and literature -but now, they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again. She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England. She had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well. It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself. I was feeling pretty pathetic, when she turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.' It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription: 'With admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read - no, devour - the book. And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work: 1) No one can say who built the great cathedrals - we have no record of their names. 2) These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished. 3) They made great sacrifices and expected no credit. 4) The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A story of legend in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof, No one will ever see it And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place. It was Almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you. I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.

No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, no Cub Scout meeting, no last minute errand is too small for me to notice and smile over. You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder. As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on. The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for 3 hours and presses all the linens for the table.' That would mean I'd built a monument to myself. I just want him to want to come home. And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, he'd say, 'You're gonna love it there...'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals. We cannot be seen if we're doing it right. And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible mothers.

Baby, it's cold outside!

The snow is coming down, but my family is all home and we've got no where to go, so it's perfectly alright with me.

Reese is sooo excited to go sledding, for some reason, and is heartbroken that there's just not enough snow yet. A little bit ago, Wade was going to go outside and take care of a few things in the garage when, of course, his mini-me Beckett, wanted to go with him. So he told him to go potty first, go find his boots in the closet, and helped him get everything on. Then, as I predicted silently in my head, Reese wanted to come too, so on went her snow gear. Then Wade had the nerve to say, "Gosh, I just needed to go outside for a minute but this is turning into a half an hour ordeal!"  Umm.... YEAH. I told him, "Welcome to my world, honey. Add a one year old to the mix and maybe you'll know how I feel every day."

Pics from today and this week:

Man, she looks old.

It's Grandpa! Last Christmas, R&B got "The Night Before Christmas", one of those Hallmark recordable books. Roger recorded it for them, and now Grandpa is in our living room everyday. All day long. The kids love it.

After making snickerdoodles, which is starting to be my favorite cookie. 

Mr. Squirrel eating our bagel birdfeeder (instructions here). Reese was freaking out, worried he was going to break it/eat it all.

Tears.

Man, I just can't seem to get back into my habit of blogging on a regular basis! Bear with me, until I find my groove again. Today I made my second cup of coffee in about 4 months, which makes me feel like myself again, hence the blog post.

Anyway, I've got much to blog about, but for today I'll just share some links that popped up on my Google Reader. (Sitting down to check my GR is one of the best parts of my day. If you don't have it yet, ask me and I'll tell you how to set it up!!!)

I don't know what is with me today, but just about everything has made me want to cry. Like, that stupid "mom cry" over a silly Folger's commercial.

* These two photographers are fantastic and their pictures from their post today made my heart melt and my eyes water.

* I can't put this book down. It's soooo good and today, it, too, made me get a little teary-eyed. I'm not quite done yet, but I highly recommend it!

* I just adore this family. They have been such a spiritual blessing in our life. There is just something about a dad and his little girl that is so special. Don't ask why this one made me get all sappy, but I cried reading this one, too.

* And lastly, I loved this post. I feel sooo stongly about this same thing, and I say something similar to Reese every day before she goes to preschool. I so desperately want this for my own kids.

And there you have it. Just 4 reasons I cried (so far) today. I'm sure it won't be the last. And speaking of crying, there is a sweet 2 year old little boy, in his bed crying since he just woke up, that I must go attend to. :)